Thursday, March 25, 2010

Things Pulled From Toilets In My House Last Weekend

1. Two Bakugan - one open, one closed (who knows how many others actually made it to the sewer line)
2. One bar of Ivory soap
3. Lid of one travel-sized container of solid deodorant
4. One travel-sized can of Gillette shaving cream. A CAN of shaving cream.

That last one? Required the draining and removal of the stool from the water source and drain hole in order to remove. Gross.

I'll give you two guesses as to how those things got flushed:


Monday, March 8, 2010

Disposable

My 7YO was getting ready for school today when I asked her to hurry up and find her shoes. She had gym today, so my request was specifically for sneakers.

She turned and asked me if it okay if she wore her Converse. The Converse were her go-to sneaker over the summer and at the beginning of the school year but quickly became kind of a pain to get on and off (and were also filthy). So, I said, "No, just put on your adidas."

And then, she told me the following:

"Well, the shoelaces were fraying and kind of broken so I threw them away."

"Oh, that's okay," I said, "Wear your Converse today and I'll get new laces for the adidas at Target."

"But I threw them away."

"Your SHOES?!"

"Yes."

"WHEN?!"

"Last week." (i.e., before last Friday when the trash was picked up)

So, my kid threw out a perfectly good pair of running shoes because the shoe laces were frayed. And didn't tell me until it was too late.

I don't even know what else to say about that. I just don't know what to say. I'm a little peeved.

The Problem with Pronouns

My three-year-olds are starting to put all the pieces of the language puzzle together. Often, with humorous results. The latest? Two different problems with pronouns.

"DON'T TOUCH MY COMPUTER!" Probably a command I bark at least once a day. It has come to my attention though that, in their attempts to maneuver the perilous roads of English grammar, my little boys don't entirely understand possessive pronouns.

Now we hear things like "That's Daddy's mycomputer" and "Where's Mommy's mycomputer?"

When I throw on an old t-shirt bearing the name of the college bar my husband worked at back in the day (shut up, you still have college t-shirts in your drawers too), one of my three-year-olds says, "Look! It's your mycomputer!"

Here's the logo:



Contrary to toddler belief, it's not a computer monitor.

It's a stylized depiction of this:



A beer schooner.

Believe me, my husband didn't hang out at a lot of places with computers in college.

And the second pronoun story?

When speaking, I never use the colloquially-used brand name for the paper product used to wipe or blow one's nose. No "Kleenex" for me. Not sure why. (I do use the product Kleenex. Only if they have the most attractive or least unattractive boxes though.)

Little H had a runny nose last week. So, all day long, I told him to "go get a tissue!"

We were waiting for G to come out of an after-school class last Wednesday when H walked up to me and said, "Mom, I need a tish-me."

Tissue. Tish-you. Tish-me. I can't get him to stop saying it. It just makes sense to him. And, I guess I can see how it does. Kind of like mycomputer.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Clue #1 That I Need to Wash My Car



I got out of my (very dirty) SUV on Sunday morning to fill the gas tank. And I discovered the above-pictured artwork on my gas cap cover. I laughed out loud.

And the coolest thing about my new custom look? I knew exactly which of my three-year-olds did it. He has a very distinct "happy face" technique. And this is it.

I showed him the picture and asked him if he did it. "YES! I did it for YOU!"

I love that kid.